Each child must be bound to make mistakes. The task is not to blame parents, but encouraged so that they can get up and fix mistakes.
One day you and your wife had made anxious. Why, one boy's adolescence of you who do not come home on time as usual. Yet when it was night. No one person's house who knows where he went, including the students. Usually the child always ask permission or notify in advance if he wanted to go.
Some time after that he came. Quizzed had inquired turns your child went with her friends to the night spots. Want to feel your anger. But you must realize that the anger will not solve the problem, instead will make the problem more complicated. You should invite him in dialogue. It turned out that the dialogue that is packaged in a dignified manner and not judgmental, problems can be resolved. Children want to open, willing to admit mistakes, even with his own consciousness he is willing to account for his mistake.
Brother, we must always be wise in addressing the behavior of our children. Why, every phase of growth and how to educate children need a different way of directing. Phase baby can not be approached in a pattern of education for the age of three years. Neither the pattern of education for children over three years can not be used for children aged five or six years. Similarly, when faced with children who are teenagers.
Actually there are certain roles that parents should play in educating their children. Faced with children who have adolescent for example, parents should be able to position himself as a friend. Establish communication with them as to friends, because kids that age need to communicate with friends and a place to vent.
How to begin? First, apply the principles I'm Not a Threat To you when dealing with children. This is very important, because someone changed because of misunderstanding. Got it coming because of the communication. And communication that would be good if there is a sense of security. When children feel safe or comfortable communicating with us, then he will be more open. When doing a mistake, he usually will voluntarily confessed to his parents. Conversely, if they are afraid and feel threatened, then the communication will not go well. Therefore, always ask, whether the children feel safe to communicate with us or not?
Second, create a communication supportive, encouraging, and not weaken. Each child would have done wrong. Under these conditions the position of parents, ideally, not as a party to blame, but as the party encouraged the child to get up and fix mistakes. Remember the story of a boy who complained to his father, "Excuse me dad, my grades four". Then answered by his Father, "Huh, four? It’s Amazing, Daddy had got 3.5, but after studying it so diligently, trying desperately to learn. and finally Daddy be a star after that in classroom. Come on boy get up, learn more harder and try again!".
Third, open and being corrected. Do not be ashamed to admit mistakes or shortcomings. Feel free to learn in children, if indeed they have the knowledge that we do not have. "Come on kid, you input the Father". So, here we develop the importance of honest dialogue.
Not a few parents who force their children to always accept the opinion or way of thinking itself. When communicating, they unconsciously apply the one-way communication; "I speak, you listen". A more precise precisely "you talk, I hear".
Authoritarian attitude has the potential to destroy the self esteem of children. If allowed to drag the child will have a negative view of self and parents. More fatal, they can show defiance, either covertly or overtly. Children also become afraid to make decisions, lack of confidence, easily hurt, and the emotional feeling the pressure.
Thus, if there is a difference of opinion, democratic and open approach far more prudent. One way is to build mutual understanding, in which each party tried to understand the point of view of others. Here, again, parents who have to initiate.
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